Are you dating a Shallow Hal?


Shallow Hal

When I dated, I was very self-conscious of being seen in a swimsuit as I didn’t have the Barbie Doll figure and suntan.  I had porcelain white skin with freckles and horrible scar on my leg from a childhood accident. Thank goodness those days are over. New stars of today like Julianne Moore have successfully broken that mold of thinking.

My husband, being 3 years younger than me, made it easier for us to get to know each other on a real level. However, I still didn’t feel comfortable being seen in shorts or shorter skirts that showed my lower legs. When I finally got brave enough to  allow him to see me in a swimsuit and the scar on my leg, he didn’t flinch at all. In fact, I was able to joke about it.

In the movie, Shallow Hal, the guy is hypnotized into seeing every girl he meets  as a supermodel. He meets the girl of his dreams, who is actually 300+ pounds, but he sees her as a gorgeous thin blonde. When the hypnosis wears off, the reality of what she actually looks like hits him in the face.  Hal decides to get hypnotized again in order to accept the love of his life, but then quickly gives up on that idea once he realizes she’s worth loving no matter what she looks like. He loves her for the person she is inside and accepts the person she is on the outside as well.

If you are dating someone at the moment, ask yourself if he can accept you as you really are. Do you feel you need to be something more than what you can be when you are around him? Are you always comparing yourself to other women he has dated before you? Are you afraid of loosing him? This is not how God intended for you to live. The Bible says, “Love is patient, love is kind and love does not demand its own way.” (1 Corinthians 13:1-14) Does the guy you are dating or perhaps engaged to love you this way?

Read about this experience and others in my book “Date, Pray, Wait,” available now on and at


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